Agnes spills the beans

In a shocking exposure of the activities of the Templar Brothers, Agnes Lovecata (pictured right) yesterday revealed the secret activities of the members of the religious order known as the Order of the Temple. She has spilt the beans about their disgusting activities, carried out in secret in the dead of night.

Agnes (38–24–38, red hair) lives on St Giles Road in the London suburbs, and enjoys lots of fresh-air activities in the great outdoors. Her hobbies include home brewing. Her husband, Robert (elderly, thin, balding), has been showing a strong interest in the activities of the Templars, but it looks as if he will no longer be able to join them.
We’d prefer Agnes to a Templar anytime!
Read more on pages 2, 3, 4, 5, 10, 11, 12 and 13